sluttyoliveoil:

once my friend was waiting for her mom to pick her up and she called her mom and her mom said “im on my way, the traffic is just slow, im coming” and my friend went “mom i called the house phone”

(via cartel)

dangergays:

kinjokunie:

dangergays:

repeat after me:

allies are not oppressed
being an ally is not a sexual orientation or gender identity
the A in LGBTQA stands for asexual

then what letter is for ally

THERE IS NO LETTER FOR ALLY

(via fellowshipofthesquats)

jesliey:

homosaurus-rex:

homosaurus-rex:

It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.

can we talk about how this is still getting notes

The funny thing is that i can not actually come up with a counter argument for this.

(via fellowshipofthesquats)

lion:

when you open the fridge after your mom went grocery shopping

(via crumbier)

librarydweller:

iraffiruse:

The Dik Dik (actual name, real animal)

I NEED SEVERAL

(via dont-panic-zoology)

Bojack Horseman

(Source: drugsandtvshowsallday, via hypnotiqa)

wet-monsoon:

oktober2nd:

lana-loves-lingua-latina:

if “barnacles” is a curse word in Spongebob, then how do you explain Barnacle Boy’s name

He’s a fuck boy

image

(via sextingforjesus)

wanksclub:

i’m the nokia phone in a room full of iphones

(Source: wanksclub, via tinderstaff)